New Year's goals are not about fixing things, drinking less, getting fitter, loosing those extra kilos or doing more things. This year is about finally honouring yourself, your dreams and stepping out of the shadows.
How many times have you set goals based on the things you don't like about yourself? So many of us think if we just 'fix' ourselves we will be happier. You start by listing everything that's supposedly wrong about you and not up some elusive external standard, and then set out to become a model citizen.
How many times have you then found yourself reaching for that glass of wine or box of chocolates and feeling like a complete failure just couple of days later?
Who cares if you didn't go to the gym at all this month! What difference does it really make into your life?
Let's be honest. It's easy to distract our own attention and focus on goals that don't really matter. Don't get me wrong, at DrivenWoman we are great advocates of healthy lifestyle. But we also know that being 'perfect' has nothing to do with feeling fulfilled and living a meaningful life.
Perfection trap leads you away from your real goals and dreams.
Perfection trap is exactly that - a trap!
When you chase external validation all your attention and energy goes to being perfect for someone else. Women especially suffer from this as there's endless list of expectations for us to fulfil.
A perfect mother. A perfect girlfriend. A perfect wife. We are not to drink too much, weigh too much, be too loud or too opinionated. We are to care for others, be kind, beautiful and ideally skinny.
All of your energy goes into pleasing others trying to reach that impossible level of perfection whilst ignoring the things that would make your own heart sing and bring life a meaning.
It's time to set goals with a purpose.
What if you set your goals based on what is positive in your life and what brings you joy?
List the things you are good at and the things you enjoy doing and set out to do more of that. List the people whose company you enjoy and who lift you up and spend more time with them. List the activities that spark your creativity (even if they aren't related to your job) and make time to enrich your soul.
Expand your circle and bring in new people who cheer on to your true aspirations. Start taking risks and sharing your ideas with others. Show up to a meeting and instead of being the passive listener set a goal to put your hand up and express your opinion (no matter what the reaction of others).
It's time to step out of your own shadows.
We are always our own worst critics. The inner 'controller' is most people's worst enemy.
Let your ideas and dreams come out without judgement. Don't compare or self-sabotage your goals before giving them a chance to come to fruition.
Remember that when you write down goals from within you soon realise they are automatically motivating and inspiring. There's no need for punishment or reward which is the case with traditional new year's resolutions such as loosing weight or staying sober. Who cares how you look if you are fulfilling your dreams!
Ladies, it is now time to start honouring yourself and your dreams. If you don't know what those are yet then that is your goal: your goal is to find out what you want in your life. That's a much juicier goal than a month without wine, wouldn't you say! (Read this article How To Set Goals If You Don't Know What You Want to get started.)
At DrivenWoman we believe that every dream was created equal and every genuine goal is worth pursuing. Don't waste time trying to be perfect before you can start. The best day to start is TODAY!
DrivenWoman is a female only empowerment platform and accountability network, that helps ambitious women to achieve their goals and dreams by creating positive habits one step at a time. Thousands of women around the world have joined our program and are achieving their life goals, which range from entrepreneurial dreams to career change or simply being more confident in their own skin and enjoying life in the present moment.
Register now to attend our online LifeWorking workshop for FREE where you will create your action plan for you new 2020 goals. (Normally only available in our premium Academy membership) on 15th January 2020.